I’m not quite the same. Right now I feel like I will never be “over” this. It was getting worse this past week, and I’ll spare you the details, but I hurt for days without relief. But somehow this morning I woke up not sad for the first time in 3 weeks. It’s a start. And one I really, fervently hope continues.

Or my mom will force me to “see someone.”

My mom. For a staunchly republican, business-owning, concealed weapon carrier, she’s a touch hippie. She saw me two days ago and decided to take me shopping. “Shopping” apparently meant going to the natural health food store for a dozen or so “mood enhancers.” I didn’t realize she was buying them for me until she asked me whether or not I would like an AM/PM pill box or if I could just take them on my own. I declined the hormones, but otherwise have been popping her herbal remedies for two whole days.

My mother-in-law. For living on Haight and Ashbury in the 1970s, is such a business woman. When I asked her to drive me home the day of the miscarriage, she was all business. She knew that I wanted no sympathy, no snuggling, just a ride. And though she was probably grieving for me, she did exactly that. Yesterday I needed her set of skills again. Freaking out about cash flow and 100% unwilling to dip into my baby savings, I called her about my declining work load. She heard the crazy in my voice and spent half an hour talking marketing angles with me.

And I don’t know if the placebo effect of the supplements or the hope that the marketing conversation gave me, but today I woke up and felt vaguely normal. And I know it’s due in some small part to my moms.

One thought on “Moms.

  1. I’m glad you have a good support system. It’s strange how they can know just what you may need even when you don’t. They don’t always get it right, but I’m glad yours are there for you to lean on. Here’s hoping things continue to look up for you. You’re stronger than you think.

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