Friends, the coolest baby ever is now half-baked. How’s that for awesome? I was just thinking how if I added up all my miscarriages (even minus the 2 fake weeks at the beginning of each one), plus this pregnancy, I would practically be done by now. I want gestation points.
My husband designed made me a pair of earrings to celebrate this momentous occasion.
Did I mention he’s the coolest guy ever? The bead is a cherry seed from cherries I picked this summer. I love that they are so feminine and, well, pregnant, without being in your face about it.
The news this week:
- I have heartburn every day. I’m currently waiting for my husband to finish his project so we can bike to the store to get some Tums. (Mint flavored. Fruity Tums are just wrong).
- I had another midwife appointment today–awesome midwife and student only. I LOVE them. They’re so great.
- I have acquired a lovely glider/rocker and the exact co-sleeper of my dreams from Craigslist ads.
- The baby stopped being a punk and decided to move around a bit more. I’m amused by it, but seriously, I still don’t actually believe there’s a baby in there. I’m like an interested observer of my body. I grow a belly. I feel kicks. I hear the heart beating. It’s fun and interesting, but nothing about this is real to me yet. I suspect it may never be.
I’m working on Operation-Make-Friends so I’m not a Lonely, Depressed Mom. It’s working nicely. After our bishop gave a fan-freaking-tastic lesson on questioning mormons like myself (where I was even used as a positive example–I know–positive. I’m as shocked as you are), I had several people come up to me and tell me that they love my comments in church and have been wanting to get to know me better. I even scheduled “coffee” with another professional today and had the best time.
She’s unorthodox like myself, but tells almost no one, and she has her reasons for that. She says this is why me and my big mouth are so needed. I’ve never felt needed in my ward. It’s awesome. But something she said stuck in my mind–she was worried about excommunication for even discussing the doubts we had discussed. And I’m like–come again? No.
No one is excommunicating members for having and discussing doubts in a group setting. As long as you aren’t galvanizing mass groups of people against the church structure, you’re pretty safe nowadays–even if you are a BKP Top Three Threat (Intellectual, Homosexual, and/or Feminist). If this is what keeps people silent in Sunday School or stifling legitimate questions, I’m going to guess they haven’t been around the bloggernacle. If John Dehlin is still around, you’re probably fine.
What I find so interesting about this is I had NO FRIENDS in my ward for over a year. Finally when I got bored and frustrated and had absolutely nothing to lose anyway, I started opening my mouth. I aimed to be respectful and constructive, but by my meaning it was easy to tell that I’m not orthodox. And suddenly? Friends. Just a few at first. I’m not super close to anyone yet. But people actually miss me if I’m gone. They’ll sit with me. They’re excited about the baby. The point I’m making is you have to be yourself.
Especially if you = awesome.